There's Something About That Clock

Last night I actually caught the clock at 11:11. I don't think anyone would believe how long it's been since this has happened and I made a wish. But, last night, for old time's sake, I decided to make a wish at that magical moment. And then, for old time's sake, at 11:12 I realized that I'm still wishing for the wrong things.

The good news? I turned off the computer and got ready to go to sleep. The clock by my bed? It said 11:11 so I made my responsible wish like I should've the first time. That still counts, right??? We'll just call it a Wish Do Over...

Intentional Ignorance

The signs are all there whether I admit them or not. But, even while ignoring them, I'm trying to fight against myself. Making plans when I don't want to, pushing myself outside the comfort zone, and looking for reasons not to let the slide continue even though the climb back up is so steep. I'm trying. I really am trying.

My Theory Was Right...Unfortunately

Turns out it wasn't the poker-thon or the 1 hour of sleep that did me in Saturday morning. After feeling not so great for two weeks and then stumbling up to bed last night, too tired and miserable to even put the freshly laundered sheets on the bed or close the blinds, I cocooned myself in a quilt and fell asleep sprawled across the bare mattress. I was sick. Sick, sick, sick. In fact the only times I've felt halfway good all week were when I was sipping red drinks and betting chips. I woke up this morning, not to sunlight streaming in but to the sight of a big bright moon outside my window and felt a little better. My fever was gone and I actually thought breakfast was a good idea. But, I think the lesson learned is that alcohol fueled conversation and bad poker hands are still my good friends. Thank goodness the week is halfway over.

The Email Equivalent Of An Awkward Conversation

I just received one of those messages - you know the kind - it's an email that basically says "Have a nice life" without actually saying it. No need for Reading Between The Lines For Dummies - the overly polite response that in no way invites further conversation (ex - "Best of luck with that") is a clue even I can decipher. Well, I tried. And, maybe I should be sad or troubled. That's how I would've been a few years ago. But today when I read that email I just started laughing and said "Ok, then." And then I hit delete. And I liked it.

What To Remember About Karma

She's fast, she has very sharp teeth and she knows where you are hiding.

I don't know how I let myself forget that.

January

If this were any other time, any other month, I would speak. The words would spill as water, impossible to hold back, dripping from between my lips. But the weather is cold and the words hibernate where they should, hidden away behind unwritten rules, curled up in a ball of truth that is not what you think or fear or expect. They curl up tightly against the chill of the wind and the threat of the ice in their nest of caution and wonder, waiting for a small hint of Spring.

Here's The Problem

I'm so far behind that I don't know where to start.

Now Exciting Another One Of Your Senses

You know I can't resist adding things. I. Just. Can't. Help. It. So, I added sound to my blog. Is it too loud? Does it startle you? Annoy you? Because, you know what? I just couldn't help it...

Do any of the songs mean anything? Sure. Am I telling you which ones? Not today.

BTW - you can turn the sound off on the player at the bottom of the page. If you're crazy or dumb or something :)

What The Weekend Has Taught Me

1. I need to get my ass back in gear. Pessimistic or not about selling the house, I've gotta get back to keeping it looking halfway decent. After 10 months, it's frustrating to be cleaning all the time but I'm realizing that that's just too damn bad.

2. On a Saturday morning, the time between 3 and 6am melt away faster than any other time of day.

3. Whenever I think I've got something figured out, I very quickly find out I'm wrong.